Husband and Wife Make Time for Each Other and Study Islam

As Salaamu Alaikum, and good morning. We have had a wonderful week alhumdulilah so much has been accomplished. let's see we made schedules on Sunday, organized our kitchens on Monday, figured out how to save a little extra money on Tuesday, realized that we weren't close to done with learning Islam on Wednesday, Had fun making prayer rugs with out little ones on Thursday and created some lasting family traditions on Friday. Whoa what a week it has been! Now we are back at Saturday and Alhumdulilah we can take sometime to take care of mom and dad, those two very important members of our households, that's right us! So many times I say this and I have a few companions who tell me I sound like a broken record, however it is so very important that the leaders of the home are well, have high Iman, Taqwaa, patience, piety, and knowledge. How else can we raise a new generation of Muslim, a generation which fears and obeys Allah and benefits the Ummah of Rasulluallah ( Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) .

So today my suggestion is to once again focus on the president (husband, dad) and vice president (wife, mom). However we are going to try and view it from a different angle, we are Insha Allah making this a day for husband and wife to focus on increasing their Iman through increasing their ibaadat and knowledge.

Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3095, Narrated AbuUmamah , Transmitted by Ibn Majah

The Prophet used to say, "After fear of Allah a believer gains nothing better for himself than a good wife who obeys him if he gives her a command, pleases him if he looks at her, is true to him if he adjures her to do something, and is sincere towards him regarding her person and his property if he is absent."

Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi #3254, Narrated Anas ibn Malik  

Allah's Messenger said, "When a woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of Paradise she wishes."

[AbuNu'aym transmitted it in al-Hilyah.]

Hadith - Al-Tirmidhi 3272, narrated Abu Hurayrah

When Allah's Messenger was asked which woman was best he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he disapproves." [Nasa'i and Bayhaqi, in Shu'ab al-Iman transmitted it.]

"They ask your legal instruction concerning women, say:  Allah instructs you about them..." [Qur'an 4:127]

The Prophet said:

"The best among you is the one who is the best towards his wife"



Hadith - Muslim, #3469

Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger as saying: A believing man should not hate a believing woman; it he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.

"Among His signs is the fact that he has created spouses from among yourselves, so that you may find tranquillity with them; and he has put love and mercy between you. In that are signs for people who reflect." [Qur’an 30:21]

and again:

"They (wives) are garments for you, while you are garments for them." [Qur’an 2:187]

Not just today, but everyday show kindness and gentleness towards one another. Today let's try just sitting together and talking with each other, not about the problems of the children, or the bills of the house, or the issues with menus. Whatever issues we have let's leave them off and focus on each other, discuss how we can pencil in time in both our busy schedules to study something together, memorize a new surah, review a surah, study it's tafsir. Let's talk about how much we truly mean to each other. This is so important and life with all the things that busy us can keep us away from the simple things like saying "Honey I appreciate what you do for our family, you did a wonderful job today, May Allah be pleased with you. Etc.." 

Continue reciting the Qur'an because on the Day of Qiyaamah it will appear as an intercessor for the reciter.
(Muslim).

A person whose breast is devoid of the Qur'an (i.e. has not learnt anything of the Qur'an Majeed) is like a desolate house.(Tirmidhi).

Whoever recites the Qur'an well and clearly is equal in rank to the Angels who record creation's deeds. These Angels are gracious, honorable and of lofty rank. He who finds difficulty in reciting the Qur'an will obtain a double reward.
(Bukhari, Muslim).

This is something husband and wife can do together, encourage one another with this, memorize it, learn it's meaning together and implement it in your lives. You will see that this makes your marriage and your household beautiful.

Eating together in groups is Sunnah and it is a cause of Baraka (Blessing) in the meal. Abu Dawood reported in his 'Sunan' that the companions of the Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said to him 'O Prophet of Allah! We eat but do not get satisfied. He said: "May be you eat individually" . They replied: 'yes'. He said: "Get together for your meal and mention the name of Allah on it, Allah will bless it for your." Al-Albany said this Hadith has a good chain. Ibn Attiya said in his Tafseer (Qur'an explanation): 'This seerah (tradition of eating together) was inherited by the Arabs from Prophet Ibrahim who used never to eat alone.' Then Allah said: {……No sin on you whether you eat together or apart……. } [24:61]
This verse made it lawful for the person to eat alone even though looking for another person to share the same meal with him is a good thing. So, if the person eats alone, this does not obligatorily means that Satan will eat with him. The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: "When a person enters his house and mentions the name of Allah at the time of entering it and while eating the food, Satan says (addressing himself): You have no place to spend the night and no evening meal; but when he enters without mentioning the name of Allah, the Satan says: You have found a place to spend the night, and when he does not mention the name of Allah while eating food, he (the Satan) says: You have found a place to spend the night and evening meal." [ Muslim ]

Many of us have spouses who work long hours and we eat before they are home, however if at all possible try and make a few days when you can sit together and eat and enjoy each others company and talk about the good things in your day.

These are just a few suggestions for strengthening your marriage, it is so very important. I am sure many of you have other suggestion so if you would so kindly share them with us that would be beautiful. Insha Allah "Enjoy your day"

Fit Friday, Let's Make Some Lasting Family Traditions

As Salaamu Alaikunna and good morning sisters! Alhumdulilah we have reached another Friday and this is our day. Let's make the most of it and start making some lasting family traditions. We have so few years with our children trust me they pass by so quickly, before you know it our children are out of our homes and constant care and supervision. For all of you who have young adult children you can relate with me here. You never stop missing them or wanting them around, so cherish the time you have to make lasting impressions on them, so that when they are older they still want to be around you as well. It starts when they are younger giving them a knowledge of Islam and showing them a love of Islam and of course plenty of Duaat. So today insha Allah we will go over some ways that we can celebrate Friday together as a family.

The Virtues and Sunnnat of Jummah
Hadhrat Ali Ibn Abu Taalib (RA) narrated: on the pulpit in the mosque of Kufah: When Friday comes, the devils go to the markets with their flags, and involve people in their needsand prevent them from the Friday prayer. The angels come early in the morning, sit at the door of the mosque, and record that so-and-so came at the first hour, and so-and-so came at the second hour until the imam comes out (for preaching). When a man sits in a place where he can listen (to the sermon) and look (at the imam), where he remains silent and does not interrupt, he will receive a double reward. If he stays away, sits in a place where he cannot listen (to the sermon), silent, and does not interrupt, he will receive the reward only once. If he sits in a place where he can listen (to the sermon) and look (at the imam), and he does not remain silent, he will have the burden of it. If anyone says to his companion sitting besides him to be silent (while the imam is preaching), he is guilty of idle talk. Anyone who interrupts (during the sermon) will receive nothing (no reward) on that Friday. Then he (the narrator) says in the end of this tradition: I heard the Apostle of Allah (peace be upon him) say so. (Abu Dawood 1046)

1. Jummah preparations should begin on Thursday such as clipping the nails, removing of the hair etc (Ihya aul-Uloom, vol. 1, page 161)

2. To have a bath (Ghusl) (Bukhari, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah)

On one Friday, Rasulallah said: "O Muslims! Allah Ta'ala has made this day a day of Eid. So have a bath on this day, whoever has perfume should apply it, and use the Miswaak.“ (Ibn Majah)

3. To use Miswaak (Ibid)

4. To use Attar (Perfume) (Ibid)

5. To wear nice clothes (Abu Dawood, Chapter of Ghusl on the day of Jummah)

6. To proceed early as possible to the Masjid for Jummah

Rasulallah (Pbuh) said: "On the day of Jummah, the angels stand at the entrance of that Masjid in which Jummah salaat is to be offered. They write down the name of the person who enters the Masjid first, and thereafter the name of the person who follows, and they continue doing this. The person who entered first will receive the reward of sacrificing a camel in the path of Allah; the one who followed him will get the reward of sacrificing a cow, thereafter a chicken, thereafter the reward of giving an egg as charity in the path of Allah.
Once the khutbah commences, the angels close the register and begin listening to the khutbah. “ (Bukhari and Muslim)

7. To walk to the Masjid if possible for every step is a reward of a years Nafl Fast (Tirmidhi)

8. One should listen very attentively to the khutba even if one does not understand. One should not speak or even warn another to keep quite while the khutba is in progress.

9. To try to sit as close as possible to the Imaam. (Ibn Majah, Tirmidhi)

10. If the Saffs (rows) are already filled, one should not jump over the shoulders of the musallies in order to get to the front. (Abu Dawood)

11. One should not fiddle with clothes or fingers but listen attentively (Ibn Majah)

12. When Rasulallah (Pbuh) name is mentioned in the khutba then it is permissible to recite durood in the heart only without the movement of the lips or tongue.


13. Between the two khutba’s one should make dua. It is permissible to make dua without raising hands or moving the lips (I.e. dua should be made in the heart only without the movement of the lips or the tongue) (Aadaab -E - Zindagee)

14. To read: Surah Al A’ala (Sura no 87) in the first rakaat of Jummah Salah and Surah Gaathia (Surah no 88) in the second rakaat. (Bukhari)

15. Related by Hakim and Bayhaqi, from Abu Sa`id “Whoever recites Surat al-Kahf on Friday, light shall shine forth for him between the two Fridays.” (Ibn Hajar, Talkhis al- Habir)

16. Rasulallah (Pbuh) is reported to have said, “Recite Durood upon me in abundance on the day of Jummah since they are presented to me.” (Ibn Majah)

17 . Making abundant dua on Jummah

Rasulallah (Pbuh) said: "There is such an hour on Friday that if any Muslim makes dua in it, his dua will definitely be accepted.” (Bukhari, Muslim)

18 . Reciting Durood 80 times after Asr:

According to a Hadith recorded in Tabarani on the authority of Abdullah Ibn Abbas (RA) : Abu Hurraira (RA) reports that the Holy Prophet (Pbuh) said: “Whoever recites the following Durood eighty times immediately after Asr Salaat on Friday, before standing up from his place, Allah will forgive eighty years of sins and grant him the reward equivalent to eighty years of worship.”

Allahumma salli alaa muhammadinin nabiyyil ummiyyi wa-ala aalihi wasallim tasleema

O Allah bless Muhammad, the unlettered Prophet, and his family and grant them best of peace. (Jame Sagheer)

19. Abu Hurraira narrated that the Messenger of Allah (Pbuh) said: The five daily prayers, and from one Jummah to the next, are an expiation for whatever sins come in between, so long as one does not commit any major sin. (Muslim, 233)

20. It was narrated from Abu Hurraira that the Prophet (Pbuh) said: Whoever does Ghusl then comes to Jummah, and prays as much as Allah decrees for him, then listens attentively until the khutbah is over, then prays with him (the imam), will be forgiven for (his sins) between that and the next Jummah and three more days. (Muslim, 857)

Al-Nawawi (Ra) said:

The scholars said that what is meant by his being forgiven between the two Jummah and three more days is that a good deed is worth ten like it, so he will be rewarded with ten rewards for each of the good deeds that he did on Friday. Some of our companions said: What is meant by what is between the two Jummah is from Jummah prayer and the khutbah until the same time on the following Friday, so that it will be seven days, no more and no less, then three days are added making ten in all.

21. Coming early to Jummah brings a great reward.

Abu Hurraira (Ra) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (Pbuh) said: “Whoever does Ghusl on Friday like Ghusl for janaabah, then goes to the prayer (in the first hour, i.e., early), it is as if he sacrificed a camel. Whoever goes in the second hour, it is as if he sacrificed a cow; whoever goes in the third hour, it is as if he sacrificed a horned ram; whoever goes in the fourth hour, it is as if he sacrificed a hen; and whoever goes in the fifth hour it is as if he offered an egg. When the imam comes out, the angels come to listen to the khutbah.”
(Bukhari, 814 and Muslim, 850)

22. If a person walks to Jummah prayer, for every step he will have the reward of fasting and praying qiyaam for one year.

It was narrated from Aws ibn Aws al-Thaqafi that the Messenger of Allah (Pbuh) said: Whoever does Ghusl on Friday and causes (his wife) to do Ghusl, and sets out early, and comes close to the imam and listens and keeps quiet, for every step he takes he will have the reward of fasting and praying qiyaam for one year.” (al-Tirmidhi, 496)

Ibn al-Qayyim (Ra) said in Zaad al-Maâ’aad, 1/285:

May Allah give us the ability to act upon all of these virtuous deeds and Sunnah of Rasulallah (salla allahu alaihi wa sallam). Ameen

For many of us women we are not going to the masajid every Friday and even when we do, we can still and should have some traditions at home with our children and husbands. Friday is our Eid and we should celebrate it, in a manner that will Insha Allah be both beneficial to our families and pleasing to Allah. As wives and mommies we are so important in raising this foundation of good in our homes so there are a few things we can do.

Read Quran with your Children

Insha Allah this gives them a love of Allah's book and it also creates a feeling of love between the family.  Insha Allah we can set an example for our children and when they are older they will remember that this is something good to do.





Have Family Dinner

Insha Allah this is something we do already we eat together as a family, however on Friday make the day a little more festive. Plan a nice meal, it doesn't have to be big, but maybe we can make the house nice and use the nice dinner ware. Just make it an enjoyable, special experience. It will be something that insha Allah when our children are grown up they remember and love to do with you. SO they will want to keep this tradition and always come to mom and dads house, even when they have their own families.


Play Games Together

This can be any type of permissible game, such as Islamic trivia (you can make the questions according to your child's knowledge) this is fun and it creates love and also is a great way of increasing your child's knowledge and insha Allah Iman. Board games are also fun, such as scrabble Jr. and things like that. This creates a family bond and the children look forward to their Eid. 





Let's start some family traditions with our children, teach them the virtues and etiquettes of Friday according to the Quran and Sunnah. Show them love for our religion and family. Insha Allah they will grow up knowing that every week for the Muslim is a holiday. Please enjoy your day with your families, and May Allah give you the good of this day, this world and the here after. Ameen

Any sisters who would like to share some of their family traditions for Friday please share them with us so that we may all draw benefit from each other.

Schedule Sundays! Procrastination another form of laziness!

As Salaamu Alaikum and good morning. Today is schedule Sunday. I am coming to you today not to show you how to make schedules, or what schedules you should be making. Instead Insha Allah I am going to help you to move past procrastination insha Allah and into regular paced routine that you can follow. Procrastination you say? Yes, sisters we all know that we need schedules, we need them in order to organize our super busy days. We purchase charts, we surf the net, we seek advice, and we finally make a schedule. That's great! However the schedule is sad, it is lonely, he has sat on your desk, or hung on your fridge and collected dust. He really wants you to use him, and you really miss him too,but you just can't seem to give it its full rights. I propose the reason for this is procrastination, it hinders us, it makes us lazy, it tells us that we can get to it later, or tomorrow. It lies to us, telling us we don't really need it, we are fine and have been doing fine on our own for this long. It is our comfort, our cheerleader and dare I say our companion. However procrastination, has help entering our lives and help staying, he has a companion stronger than we think, but in reality his companion is weak if we know how to fight him. He is Shaitan!  

Shaitan has many ways and means. It is recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari that the Prophet (Salla Allahu alaihi wa Sallam) said,
"During your sleep, Satan ties three knots at the back of your necks. He breathes the following into them, 'The night is long so keep on sleeping.' If the person wakes and praises Allah, then one of the knots is unfastened. And if he performs ablution, the second knot is unfastened. When he prays, all of the knots are unfastened. After that he will be energetic and happy in the morning. Otherwise he would get up listless and grouchy."

It is also recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim that he said,
"When one of you rises from your sleep he should make ablution. He should rinse his nose three times. For Satan stays in the upper part of one's nose during the night."
Al-Bukhari also records that the Prophet (Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) was asked about a man who sleeps until the morning comes, that is, after the time of the dawn prayer. He said,"That is a man whom Satan has urinated into his two ears."

What is mentioned is from among the ways that Satan hinders the human from doing some actions. He also whispers into the human a love for laziness, postponing or procrastinating actions and thinking about what a long period of time we have to complete actions or work. 

It is time to fight back! Take control of your life, step back and look at what procrastination has done for you. He hasn't been that good of a companion to you. The schedules are sad, you are exhausted, the house is not how you want it, the children are not quite how you want them to be. So get rid of this unworthy companion, and move on to a better one, he goes by the name of "MR. SCHEDULE" some have termed him routine, others still call him organization, but he is one in the same and he really does help.
Sisters, there is so much benefit in being organized and in rising early in the morning. So much more gets accomplished. I am not saying that i don't get stressed or tired, but what I am saying is that since I have been practicing this method of rising and staying awake after fajr and scheduling my day, it has been so much easier. Wallahi I have less confusion in my day, less headache, less chaos, less worry. I am able to do all the things I need to do. I am able to study Islam and Quran where as before I had to compete for time for it, because there was just so much else to do. I am able to take care of my home, my children, myself and my husband and still have free time at the end of the day. I swear by Allah this is my case now. I have practiced this for 10 years now and the benefits are amazing. Alhumdulilah. I am reaching my goals and that is what is important to us all. Set goals, prioritize, and shake off procrastination.

"Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise" - a famous maxim coined by the American scientist, writer and inventor, Benjamin Franklin.  And he was not alone in these beliefs.  The writer Samuel Johnson also warned that "nobody who does not rise early will ever do any good".

So how can we turn getting up for Fajr into a double advantage?  Certainly not by slinking back into bed again and snuggling up for another few hours.  As prophet Mohammed (salla allahu alaihi wa sallam) said:"The most excellent jihad is that for the conquest of self." (Bukhari)

In the context of fajr, what this means is, once up, stay up!  Stay up and do something useful.  Work on your goals.  If you don't have any, set some.  Decide what you want to achieve in life.  Devise a plan to make those goals a reality then take action.  You will be amazed at what you can get done in those few quiet hours when most of the rest of the world is still asleep.  You can organise your day, learn a language,memorize Quran, review Quran, prepare your dinner early freeing up more time to rest later,or get fit by going jogging in the coolness of the morning. Whatever you want to do! Just do it!

According to a hadith recorded in Sahih Muslim, prophet Mohammed (salla allahu alaihi wa sallam) stated that the action which is dearest to Allah is salat at its proper times.  On another occasion prophet Mohammed(salla allahu alaihi wa sallam)  also said to his companions:

"The five set prayers may be compared to a stream of fresh water, flowing in front of your house, into which you plunge five times each day. Do you think that would leave any dirt on your body?' When they replied: 'None at all!' Mohammed (salla allahu alaihi wa sallam) said: 'Indeed the five prayers remove sins, just as water removes dirt."  (Bukhari, Muslim)

Prophet Mohammed (salla allahu alaihi wa sallam)  also tells us that fajr salat along with isha is particularly rich in blessings:

"If people only knew what blessings are in the fajr and isha prayers, they would come to them, even if they had to crawl." (Bukhari and Muslim)

So Alhumdulilah we understand the blessing and benefit of getting up for Fajr Salat.

Date Night, yes it's Sassy Saturday

As Salaamu Alaikunna and good morning, it's date night again. Time once again to focus on President and Vice President of the cooperation. It's time once again to remember our marriages and work on keeping them fresh.

Marriage: Purpose and Obligation

Definition of Marriage

Nikah is an Arabic term used for marriage. It means "contract". ("Aqd in Arabic). The Quran specifically refers to marriage as "mithaqun Ghalithun,". Which means "a strong covenant".

"and they have taken a strong pledge (Mithaqun Ghalithun) from you?" (Quran 4:21)

The seriousness of this covenant becomes obvious when one finds the same term i.e., Mithaqun Ghalithun, being used for the covenant made between Allah and the Prophet before granting them the responsibility of the Prophethood. (Quran 33:7)
The Quran also uses the Arabic word "Hisn", suggesting "fortress" for marriage. Marriage is considered the fortress of chastity.

The Purpose of Marriage

As a meaningful institution, marriage has two main purposes:
To ensure preservation of the human species and continuation of the human race,

"O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord, Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate and from them has spread abroad a multitude of men and women" (Quran: 4:1)

To provide spiritual and legal foundation of the family

"And of His signs is this: He created for you mates from yourself that you might find rest in them, and He ordained between you love and mercy. Lo, therein indeed are portents for folk who reflect". (Quran 30:21)

Through Marriage, the conjugal relationship between a man and a woman becomes lawful. It provides a legitimate outlet for recreation as well as procreation. Islam regards sex as natural and good, but restricts it to the partners of marriage so as to ensure the responsibility for its consequences.

"Your women are a tilth for you so go to your tilth as you will, and send (good deeds) before you for your souls, and fear Allah, and know that you will (one day) meet him. Give glad tidings to believers, (O Muhammad)." (Quran 2:223)

Marriage provides spiritual, physical, emotional and psychological companionship. This companionship generates and sustains love, kindness, compassion, mutual confidence, solace and succor (sakinah). It lays a spiritual and legal foundation for raising a family. The children born of the matrimonial union become legitimate and mutual rights of inheritance are established.

Marriage: A Religious Requirement

Marriage in Islam is a recommended as a religious requirement.

"Marry those among you who are single and (marry) your slaves, male and female, that are righteous" (Quran 24:32)

Prophet Muhammad (S) declared:

"When the servant of Allah marries, he has fulfilled half the (responsibilities laid on him by the) faith; so let him be God conscious with respect to the other half". (Mishkat)

Marriage has also been commended as the way of the prophets.

"We indeed sent messengers before you (O Muhammad), and We assigned them wives and children" (Quran 13:38)

Marriage, in fact, is specifically considered the tradition (sunnah) of Prophet Muhammad (S) when he declared:

"Marriage is my Sunnah, whoever disregards my (sunnah) path is not from among us". (ibn Majah)

Islam discourages celibacy and encourages marriage, as Prophet Muhammad (S) recommended:

"Whoever is able to marry, should marry". (Bukhari)

[Source: Marriage and Family in Islam]

Islam places great emphasis on marriage and family life and that is why I come to you every Saturday with a reminder to put your marriage first, to make it the center of your family this structure is so important. The husband and wife must have harmony between themselves and the children benefit from seeing mom and dad loving each other. It teaches our sons how they should be as husbands and our daughters how they should be as wives and how their husbands should be treating them. So today I have a few ideas on how we can best celebrate our marriages today and I would also like you all to comment on some ideas that you may have. Please share with us all your views and ideas for keeping your marriage strong.

Outdoor Date Ideas

Go for a bike ride in your neighborhood—maybe find a tandem bicycle to borrow or rent.

Go on a picnic, but choose somewhere extremely random--like on your roof ( Make sure you have a flat roof) hehehe

Go fishing    

Hike to see waterfalls or wildflowers

Go boating

Indoor Date Ideas

Make a homemade pizza together then sit down for a candle light dinner with some nice Italian bread and freshly made tossed salad.

Play Board games like Scrabble, Candy Land and Sorry

Set up a tent in your front room, sit in the tent and eat dinner on a blanket--build a fake fire, or roast halal marshmallows over a candle

Romantic Date Ideas
okay you guys take the kiddies out of the room this is just between us ladies.

Let Him Indulge after you dinner allow him to run you a bath or you run him a bath and after the bath how about a nice massage.

Do some star gazing together, when it gets dark out. Grab a blanket and sit in your yard or sit out on your deck or patio or whatever outdoor space you have and enjoy the night time sky.

Make the world's largest ice cream sundae together and have fun feeding each other this fun sticky treat. Be creative with this one, and do a blindfold taste test challenge. See where it leads you.

Ladies whatever you like to do or decide to do, just do it and keep that marriage happy and healthy for the pleasure of Allah and for the stability of your family. "Enjoy your marriages and enjoy your day"

Fit Friday Part 2 Your Heart

I am reposting this post from Friday in hopes that it has some benefit today. As today is a day of reminders, for both myself and my muslim family. Alhumdulilah, my blog and my page have been of some benefit to some of the people and I pray that it is accepted of me and without any riya. Ameen. With that said I am taking a step back from posting on both my blog and the page, Insha Allah I will begin to post on next week Wednesday as I have seen so many things since joining Facebook and trying to have my Page. It really sadens me and I need a little time to step back and re-evaluate my intentions and goals.

As Salaamu Alikunna, today is "Fit Friday", and we are going to talking about the heart and ways to get it healthy and keep it that way. Many times when we think about heart health we think in terms of running, walking and other various forms of cardio exercises. While these are important in having a healthy heart, we are going to go a few steps deeper and explore the ways in which we can truly benefit our hearts.

According to a Hadith of the Prophet Muhammad (Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam),"There is an organ in the body, when it is healthy, the whole body is healthy, and when this is sick, the entire body becomes sick". It is the heart.

Insha Allah I wish for us as Muslimoon first and then as homemakers to look at the importance of this statement and how it relates to our lives. We as Muslim homemakers have a tremendous responsibility, it is weighty. We are responsible for raising our children and we will be asked about it on Yawmul Qiyaamah. What can we say, how can we avoid Allah's questioning or punishment? We have an Amanah, our children and this heart that Allah subhanAllahu wa ta'alla gave to us, it is a trust. So we need to know how to best take care of our trusts.




Step 1
Sisters I start with this one because, by Allah I see this being the biggest fitnah with the women.


                                                          Unnecessary Talking


In a hadith related on the authority of Mu'adh, the Prophet (Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said, "Shall I not tell you how to control all that?" I said, "Yes do, O Messenger of Allah." So he held his tongue between his fingers, and then he said: "Restrain this." I said, "Oh Prophet of Allah, are we accountable for what we say?" He (Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said, "May your mother be bereft by your loss! Is there anything more than the harvest of the tongues that throws people on their faces (or he said 'on their noses') into the Fire?"


It has also been related by Abu Huraira, may Allah be pleased with him, that the Prophet,(Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said, "Let whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day either speak good or remain silent."Abu Huraira reported that Ibn al-Abbas said: "A person will not feel greater fury or anger for any part of his body on the Day of Judgement more than what he will feel for his tongue, unless he only used it for saying or enjoining good."  
A hadith related by Abu Huraira says, "What mostly causes people to be sent to the Fire are the two openings: the mouth and the private parts."


These are just a few of the Hadith on this subject. Sisters I beg you to think about how much we speak unnecessarily. A lot of times a women who are home all day we feel tired and alone from having no adults to communicate with,so when we have an opportunity speak to our sisters we begin to talk too much and the talk is seldom beneficial. I want us all to think about what we are doing to ourselves and our trusts. Don't spend so much time complaining about the day you had or what your child did wrong. Take it as a time to remind each other of the blessing that Allah have given to us, give each other solutions for dealing with stress according to the Quran and Sunnah. The tongue can be used for good or evil, we have to consciously make the decision of how we will use our tongues.


Step 2
                                                   Unrestrained Glance


When we look at things without turning away from them we can become attracted to that thing and this attraction is imprinted on the heart.
Shaytan enters with the glance, for he travels with it, faster than the wind blowing through an empty place. He makes what is seen appear more beautiful than it really is, and transforms it into an idol for the heart to worship. Then he promises it false rewards, lights the fire of desires within it, and fuels it with the wood of forbidden actions, which the servant would not have committed had it not been for this distorted image. (The Purification of the Soul from the works of Ibn Rajab Al-Hanbabli, Ibn Al-Qayyim  al-Jawziyaa, and Abu Hamid al-Ghazali)


Staring and gazing without restraint is disobedience to Allah:
*< Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that is more purifying for them. Surely Allah is aware of what they do. (24:30)-<*


Someone may say how can I be guilty of this when I am home all day?  I say to this if you have a television in your home this is easily done. How many times on the TV do we see men and women who are clothed but naked, or acts of disobedience to Allah, or maybe even an attractive person? I don't think that everyone should follow me and throw out their television, because yes it can be used for good, but for me the evil that comes from it outweighs whatever benefit it brings to me.


Step 3
                                                      Too Much Food


The consumption of small amounts of food guarantees tenderness of the heart, strength of the intellect, humility of the self, weakness of desires, and gentleness of temperament. Immoderate eating brings about the opposite of these praiseworthy qualities. (The Purification of the Soul from the works of Ibn Rajab Al-Hanbabli, Ibn Al-Qayyim  al-Jawziyaa, and Abu Hamid al-Ghazali)


Al-Miqdam ibn Ma'd Yakrib said: "I heard the Messenger of Allah (Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) say: "The son of Adam fills no vessel more displeasing to Allah than his stomach. A few morsels should be enough for him to preserve his strength. If he must fill it, then he should allow a third for his food, a third for his drink and leave a third empty for easy breathing."

Over eating can cause us to become lazy and tired, so when it is time now to pray, but we have just eaten a huge meal, we don't want to move from our places. We are in our homes all day and it is easy to fall into over eating, but we must restrain from this. 

Step 4      

                                                          Keeping Bad Company    

Look around at who your companions are, who are they? Do they remind you of good, or call you to evil and never prevent you from evil? Are they someone that we choose just because they are stay at home moms like ourselves? As parents we want our children to take the best companions and we teach them this, we tell them "Well if so and so does such an such then they are not your friend." Or maybe we have heard this one, "If so and so jumps off the building will you?" What that means is you don't have to follow your friends in everything they do. The solution to that is choosing good companions to begin with, so this way you can and will want to follow them in all they do. We have to lead by example. 

In an authentic Hadith, the Prophet Muhammad (Salla Allahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: “A person is likely to follow the faith of his friend, so look whom you befriend.”    

  

In another Hadith, Prophet Muhammad (saws) said: “The example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of the seller of musk, and the one who blows the blacksmith’s bellows.. So as for the seller of musk then either he will grant you some, or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith’s bellows then either he will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him.”      

In his commentary of this Hadith, Imam an-Nawawy said that the Prophet (saws) compared a good companion to a seller of musk and spoke of the virtue of having companions who are good, who have noble manners, piety, knowledge and good culture. Such are those who grant us from their virtue. And he (saws) forbade us to sit with those who do evil, commit a lot of sins and other bad deeds, as well as with innovators, backbiters, and so forth. Another scholar said: “keeping good company with the pious results in attainment of beneficial knowledge, noble manners and righteous actions, whereas keeping company with the wicked prevents all of that.” Many times a Muslim is encouraged by his friends to do evil and to forget his duties. The result is that Muslims themselves are often ashamed to leave them to perform prayer, their friends thus causing them to clearly deviate from the Right Path.


Allah the Exalted says in the Qur’an: “And (remember) the Day when the wrong-doer will bite his hands and say: Woe to me! Would that I had taken a path with the Messenger. Woe to me! If only I had not taken so- and-so as a friend! He has led me astray from this Reminder (the Qur’an) after it had come to me. And Satan is ever a deserter to man in the hour of need.” Qur’an 25:27-29

Allah, the All-Wise also says: “Friends on that Day will be enemies one to another, except al-Muttaqoon (i.e. those who have Taqwah).” Qur’an 43:67

    

Sisters I wanted to bring this to us all today as a reminder, I pray it benefits us all. Ameen. I say this to myself first "Take care of your heart, keep it pure and stay away from the things that will cause it to become sick." Enjoy your Friday ladies.

Date Night Anyone?

As Salaamu Alaikum and good morning ladies, drop that apron, put down that broom, I see you, leave his test paper alone you can check it later! It's sassy Saturday! In a nutshell it is time to take care of the President and Vice President of the cooperate Office.


"And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquillity with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect." (Surah Al Rum 30:21)

Prophet (Sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallaam) said: "one would be rewarded for anything that he does seeking the pleasure of Allah even the food that he puts in the mouth of his wife."

Prophet (Sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallaam) said: "the best of you are those who are best to their wives."

Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said: “This world is just temporary conveniences, and the best comfort in this world is a righteous women.”

Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said: “If a woman prays her five daily prayers, fasts her month (of Ramadan), obeys her husband and guards her chastity, then it will be said to her: ‘Enter Paradise by whichever of its gates you wish.’”

Okay ladies so here's the deal if at all possible I want you to pledge to have a date with your husband every Saturday or whatever day works out best for the two of you. It doesn't have to be extravagant, maybe just take a walk together to the park and talk, relax oh yeah and don't bring all the children! 


If going out during the day isn't for you or you just can't find anyone during the day to watch the children, I have the perfect solution. Stay in and make it a date night, put the children to bed and watch a movie will munching on popcorn.

Are you with me so far? Now this one is for those seeking a little something more intimate; try a romantic dinner. Go all out set the table nicely candles, fresh linens, nice glasses, and your best dinner ware. Reconnect from your hectic week through sharing a sweet dessert. Unwind and relax with a nice warm bath. Whatever you decide on make it about just the two of you.   

 

I know some of you are thinking, this can't be done, but I am here to tell you it can be done. It should done and it is almost a must that it gets done. We have to remember that we are homemakers, and that means that we have a husband which is how we got those little people who tug at us all week and pull us in a million different directions. Oh yes we love our profession, but truth is there would be no profession if the President and Vice President don't connect, mesh, and communicate well. It will all fall apart, so take care of the head of the company if you want it to continue to thrive and be successful. Don't just wait until date night or date day, leave little notes on his pillow, drop a piece of chocolate in his lunch with a card that says smile on it and nothing else. Text him just to say hey, I'm thinking about you. Make dua for him constantly. Pull him out of the bed to pray tahajjud with you. Have Quran memorization competitions with him, just whatever you do please remember you two are important along with everything else, because with out the YOU TWO there would be.....(               ) you fill in the blank.

Care for the individual

As Salaamu Alaikunna, Today is Wednesday May 16, 2012. I would like to share some advice with you all today concerning the smallest members of our workplace. That's right you guessed it "Our Children". Many of us are full time homemakers and that means that we are with our children allday everyday, they do not leave to go to school, there are no after school activities. WE are it we are all they have. We are their teachers, their counselors, their activities coordinator. Yes we do it all ladies. I know that this can be overwhelming as some of us have multiple children with multiple ages to go with them. Even when you just have two this can be demanding. I also understand the importance of treating our children as individuals and not just a group. Over the years I learned the that all of my babies are very different and when I try to do them all together that little extra sparkle that makes them who they are gets dull and can ever burn out. My oldest is the quiet type and it took me at least 14 years to figure out that he just needed me to lead a conversation with him one on one in order for him to open up it was hard because I had other children, but once I figured this out I made it my business to invite him into my room at the end of the day or whenever we had a free moment and just talk to him, now he is 19 and after my husband he is my best friend. We talk often and sometimes we talk for over an hour (If I have the time to spare, but definitely everyday.) Then there is my second, my 12 year old she is a child who needs that extra love, she is very sensitive and she always wants me to confirm that she is special and doing things right. So for her I have to make sure and give her separate things to do and be sure to check up on her and tell her she did it correctly. It isn't a huge thing but it is something that goes a long way for her. Okay my third child,he is 9 he is a challenge for me, as he has been diagnosed with a form of autism called "savant". He is as smart as a whip, but he is also very easily distracted, and hyper and it takes so much more to get him to focus on me or look at me or anything. So for him I conform to his needs. He has an obsession with counting, he counts everything, he is constantly counting he gets number patterns stuck in his head and he has to count that pattern all day, if you interrupt him he starts all over again. So for him I make puzzles and patterns for him and I allow him to do them as long as he likes and I sit with him and done a couple with him. He likes that it makes him smile and that is priceless oh and it helps him to sit still for a minute. Which is needed. Bringing up the rear of the group is my 2 year old, she is a handful and I do not have the problem of giving her individual time, she is very assertive and she asserts herself into every part of my day.

So I guess where I am going with all of this is, make time for each child, find out what they need and like and give it to them. it doesn't have to be long maybe a few minutes a day. If you do this everyday you will see tremendously positive results.

Increasing Our Iman through Quran

As Salaamu Alaikum my dear beautiful sisters, insha Allah everyone of you will be on board for this challenge that I intend to propose today. As you all know a huge part of our jobs as homemakers is to teach our children Islam and help to develop a good Islamic character and knowledge in our children , in order to help them to build their Iman. however we cannot do this if we ourselves are suffering from a lack of Iman and knowledge or have bad character. I am asking that we all devote this next 30 days to memorizing a new juzz of Quran. I propose that we not only memorize it, but that we also try and implement what we learn of Tafsir and begin to make the Quran our character, I propose that we stop wasting our time backbiting and slandering and gossiping. I am asking that all sisters who speak to each other regularly and even those who don't call each other and help keep each other remain focused. I ask that we test each other and check each other. This is important, we must begin to help each other towards piety and good character, just as we are there to give recipes and share schedules and give our advice on various topics this is MOST important. So I challenge you today and I pray that all who reads this will accept the challenge and then share it with those who didn't read this.

'Aa'ishah reported that the Prophet said, "The person who reads the Qur'aan fluently is with the honourable and obedient scribes (i.e. angels), and he who reads it with difficulty, (even) he shall get (at least) a double reward" (Aboo Dawood)

Ibn Mas'ood reported that the Prophet said, "Whoever wishes to love Allaah and His Messenger, let him read the mus-haf" (Ibn Nu'aym in his Hilya).

Ibn 'Amr reported that the Prophet said, "There is no cause to be envious except in two cases: (the first is of a) person whom Allaah has taught the Qur'aan, and he recites it in the day and night, and one of his neighbours hears him and says, 'Woe to me! I wish I had been given what he has been given, then I would do what he is doing! (The second is of a) person whom Allah has blessed with wealth, and he spends it in good causes, so a person (who sees him) says, 'Woe to me! I wish I had been given what he has been given, then I would do what he is doing!" (al-Bukhaaree)

Aboo Hurayrah reported that the Prophet said, "The Qur'aan will be brought on the Day of Judgement, and it will say, 'O My Lord! Adorn him (the one who read and practised it)!' So he will be adorned with the crown of glory and honour . It will then say, 'O My Lord! Increase this!' So he will be clothed with the clothes of glory and honour. Then it will say, 'O My Lord! Be pleased with Him! So He (Allaah) will be pleased with him. It will be said, 'Recite! And rise!' and every verse he recites will bless him with a good deed" (at-Tirmidhee)

Ibn 'Amr reported that the Prophet said, "It will be said to the companion of the Qur'aan after he has entered Paradise, 'Recite, and rise!' For every verse he recites he will rise one level (in Paradise), until he recites the last verse with him (i.e., in his memory)." (Aboo Dawood)

Ibn Mas'ood reported that the Prophet said, "Recite the Qur'aan, for verily you will be rewarded for it. I am not saying that Alif-Laam-Meem will count as a word, but rather that Alif has ten (rewards), Laam has ten (rewards), and Meem has ten (rewards), so this is thirty (rewards)" (Khateeb al-Baghdaadee)

'Ismah Ibn Maalik reported that the Prophet said "If the Qur'aan is enclosed by skin (i.e., if a person memorises the entire Qur'aan), then Allaah will never burn it in the Fire (of Hell) (al-Bayhaqee)

Aboo Hurayrah reported that the Prophet said, "Never do a group of people gather together in one of the houses of Allaah, reciting the Book of Allaah and pondering over it, except that peace descends upon them, and mercy surrounds them, and the angels encircle them, and Allaah remembers them in His gathering" (Aboo Daawood)

Aboo Moosaa al-Asha'aree reported that the Prophet said, "The believer who recites the Qur'aan is like a citrus fruit - its fragrance is pleasing and its taste is sweet. The believer who does not recite the Qur'aan is like a dry date - it has no fragrance but its taste is sweet. The hypocrite who recites the Qur'aan is like a basil - its fragrance is sweet, but its taste is bitter. The hypocrite who does not recite the Qur'aan is like a colocynth - it has no smell, and its taste is bitter" (Muslim)

Let's Help Ourselves and Our Children

As Salaamu Alaikunna
 You all have heard me say this before and I will say it again; One of the most important descriptions of our profession is raising our children upon the Quran and Sunnah and being role models to such behaviour. We are Mothers, we are  Muslim, we are the Protectors, and Nurturers of our husbands children, property and wealth.
I have recently heard from a few sisters and seen for myself with my own children over the years, that our children are displaying character less than what we would like to them to be. This post today is a reminder for myself and for all of us inshaAllah. It starts with the little things or things that we believe to be small, but as a child grows little things grow into mountains. It is as if you take a small item and everyday or several times a day you place another small item on top of the first one, then you look up in 10 years and there is a mountain in front of you. We have to start by teaching the little things, and keep in mind that they are not little things in reality. So I found this article that I would like to share, because I know that this is an issue that many of us moms are dealing with and I pray that it is beneficial to us all. Ameen.

 

Three Points about Joking

Posted on November 16, 2011 by admin

In the Name of Allaah, the Most Merciful…

Let us be reminded that while light-hearted, honest joking from time to time is permissible, there are indeed dangers in joking that many of us may not think about and therefore fall into, so let us be warned about them:
1) JOKES INVOLVING LIES
Indeed the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam) warned us severely against using lies in our joking, with his statement:

ويل للذي يحدث بالحديث ليضحك به القوم فيكذب، ويل له، ويل له
“Woe to the one who lies to make people laugh, WOE TO HIM, WOE TO HIM!”

This is an authenitc hadeeth found in Sunan Abee Daawood (#4990), At-Tirmithee (#2315), and others.  At-Tirmithee called the hadeeth hasan, and Al-Albaanee agreed.
Someone may say, “Well, its obvious this joke is full of lies, but I’m not the one who made it up, I’m just passing it on.”
The reply: The hadeeth of the Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam) that Imaam Muslim brings in the introduction to his Saheeh could apply here:

كفى بالمرء كذبًا أن يحدث بكل ما سمع
“It is sufficient for a man to be considered a liar when he relays everything he hears.”

Lies in general are impermissible, in joking or outside of joking.  There are three exceptions to the general prohibition of lying in Islaam:

• Between spouses
• To correct a broken relationship
• In established military operations (jihad) under a Muslim government

Even in these three cases it must only be used to bring about a benefit.
The point is that none of the scholars exempted joking as a permissible form of lying.
2) EXCESSIVE JOKING
The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam) said:

لا تكثروا الضحك، فإن كثرة الضحك تميت القلب
“Don’t laugh too much! For verily, excessive laughter kills the heart!”

This is an authentic hadeeth found in Sunan Ibn Maajah (#4193).  Refer to Silsilat al-Ahaadeeth as-Saheehah (#506).
And he (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam) also said:

والله لو تعلمون ما أعلم لضحكتم قليلا ولبكيتم كثيرا
“I swear by the One in whose hand is my soul, if you saw what I have seen, you would laugh a little, and cry a lot.” [Al-Bukhaaree & Muslim]

So the Muslim who recognizes his priorities in life does not get caught up in excessive joking, for example, joke books or comedy programs on TV or radio, since these things will only weaken his heart, keep it away from Allaah’s remembrance, or even kill it, and Allaah’s refuge is sought.
3) INSULTING PEOPLE IN JEST (Satire, Sarcasm, Roasting, etc.)
The disbelievers have a custom of intentionally insulting a person to honor him (?!), they call it a “roast.” They gather the best comedians together to humiliate their “honoree” on his 50th birthday, or his retirement party, or other big occasion. And from their customs as well is to jokingly insult a friend, out of love or respect (?!), as you may have seen.
They might say, “This is my friend, Fulaan, the fat pig,” and they all laugh, or, “My wife, the old ball and chain…” or other derogatory terms that are actually words of insult in their origin. They only spark hatred and do not achieve any goodness, so the Muslim must be the furthest away from this kind of action. The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam) said:

سباب المسلم فسوق، وقتاله كفر
“Insulting a Muslim is fusooq (sinful disobedience), and fighting him is kufr (ingratitude, a lesser kind of disbelief).” [Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim]

Or perhaps they may say these things without that person’s presence, then it is even worse. It falls into eating your brother’s dead flesh, the dreadful sin of backbiting.
And if someone said: “But it is understood by everyone to be good, honest fun…!”
The reply: Let us be reminded of Allaah’s Verse:

الخبيثات للخبيثين والخبيثون للخبيثات والطيبات للطيبين والطيبون للطيبات
( And bad things (filthy women, bad words, etc.) are for bad people, and bad people are for bad things.  Good things (upright women, kind words, etc.) are for good people, and good people are for good things. ) [Al-Qur'aan 24:26]

And the speech of His noble Messenger (sallallaahu ‘alayhe wa sallam):

من كان يؤمن بالله واليوم الآخر فليقل خيرا أو ليصمت
“Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day must speak with goodness or remain silent.” [Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim]

With these brief and simple points, let an honest Muslim open his heart to a beautiful reminder about how his Religion gives him personal honor and upright character, raising him above the silly and shameful behavior of the disbelievers.

And Allaah knows best.

Written by: Moosaa Richardson

Originally published: 11/02/1421

Ladies this one may be of the sensitive nature, I pray no one is offended and that everyone takes it with the intention that I mean from it and that is to benefit us all. Amen.

Never and I mean never walk around your house all day (when hubby is home) looking less than your best. Always get dressed and be sure your hair is done and you smell nice.... Be sure to exercise not just to keep your health well, but also to please your husbands eye when he looks at you. I have heard women say "My husband doesn't like when I get all dolled up, or he doesn't mind what I wear around the house." To that I say......your husbands are out of the house all day and they are constantly bombarded with women, whose sole mission when they get up in the morning is to make sure they get a mans attention. I am not saying that we should have to compete with them, but I am saying there should be no competition, we should be winning that race!! Look your best, smell your best, and be your best; In the kitchen, with the children, with studing, with cleaning and dare I say this ladies in the bedroom. We are Homemakers and we chose an honorable profession, now get out there and be professional! :) Enjoy your day.

Schedules

I want to tell you a story about a woman we will call her wife "A", well she was a lovely woman. Every time the people saw her they would remark of how sweet, and soft and kind she was. Oh she was a pleasure to know and be around. Wife A had it all together her children were always well dressed, and very well behaved, she would smile and greet everyone she meet always ready to give advice if asked and she was asked often. "How do you manage to keep it all together? What are your methods of homeschooling? How did you get his shirt so white?" These were just a few of the questions asked of Wife A, yes wife A had it all together, or so everyone thought.

In her home wife A was a disaster, she would lounge around the house most of the day, of course she feed the kids and gave them a few assignments to do, but always from her room. She enjoyed reading a good book and watching a few TV shows, it kept her sane she would tell herself. Her house was in shambles most of the day, she always felt as though she never had time to do everything she needed in her day and she was simply overwhelmed. Everyday was the same, get up feed the children, leave the dishes and cleaning for later, give the children a few lessons to complete of course explain as needed. Watch a little television, not too much ( the children always needed help with something) it was exhausting they never really understood much and she couldn't figure out why. After a while of trying to watch television she would feed the children lunch allow them to play and she would read a book or try and relax. Always and I mean everyday she watched the clock for 4 pm because she knew that meant she had an hour and a half before her husband would be arriving home. Oh you should have seen her she would rush through that house cleaning and straightening, yelling at the children for making a mess and getting in her way, then rush to prepare dinner and dress herself. She would be so tired by the time he came home that it was sometimes difficult to smile and greet him pleasantly. Her husband although he wanted his wife to smile at him and ask him how his day had been felt so sorry for her he assumed the children had given her a hard time all day and she had worked so hard all day that she was just exhausted. He loved her dearly.

One day wife A visited a friend she hadn't seen in years we will call her wife B. Wife B had recently moved back into the area and was also a full time wife and mom of 5 she much like her companion appeared to have it all together. Their was only one major difference between the two of them, while wife A appeared this way wife B was this way. Oh no she wasn't perfect, no not at all. However she had a much easier day and a better handle on it as well. Wife A had left her children in the care of her mother for some much needed rest and relaxation. She sat in the house of wife B and she watched in awe. Wife B had a method, a way , and a time for everything  she did. She noticed how wife B woke the children at a certain time and how the children knew exactly what to do without being told. She noticed how she had breakfast on the table at the same time the children knew to come down to eat without being told, she noticed how they cleared the table while her companion washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen immediately while the children filed into the classroom and prepared for their lesson by getting all the materials out that they needed and guess what, she didn't have to tell them. Wife A walked into the classroom and looked around in amazement; it was so organized books in order of subject being taught lined up neatly on shelves. A place for papers and past assignments, pencils, pens, markers and crayons all in a separate basket lined up on a shelf. Everything had a place of its own. She watched quietly as wife B taught her lesson from a prepared lesson plan, not just off the top of her head she was prepared with activities and a procedure with some assessments as well. After she had taught the lesson she didn't leave the room as wife A had expected her to, she stayed in the classroom and was ready to assist when needed, although the children asked for minimal help she was still there. She walked around to each of her children to see if help was needed it was amazing to see how she was able to teach the different levels the same subject keep it general and then give them all practice work corresponding to their grade level. After a while Wife B left the classroom and she followed in silence and watched as wife B begin to prepare lunch just as she was setting the table a timer went off and the children came in to eat. At this time wife B walked into the kitchen and began cleaning the mess she had made, she didn't wash the dishes the children were still eating she simply walked out and into her lovely living room everything was so neat and sat down. At this point wife A began to speak "How is it everything is running so smoothly, is it like this everyday?" Wife B smiled at her dear companion and answered, " Yes it is and it is because we have a schedule we follow and everything is routine now, they know what to do and what to expect, of course we have days when the unexpected takes place, but with this schedule it is easy to get back on track." The two companions sat and talked for an hour while the children placed their dishes in the sink and played, some of them just relaxed for the hour. Then their was a sound of an alarm and the children filed into the playroom in the basement with wife B and A following behind. She watched as they did all different types of activities and exercises, she was in awe they all appeared to be enjoying themselves. When they had finished with that all the children each grabbed an item and placed them back neatly into whatever bin or shelf they had taken it from. Then they all went back up and into the classroom where they did the same thing there. Finally wife A was ready to watch some TV or something, but wife B had other plans after praying with her children and making sure they all performed dhikr she began to wash the lunch dishes and prepare dinner. It was now 3:30 and the day had gone by smoothly she wasn't tired or at least she didn't appear to be, the house was clean , neat and organized and she was starting dinner. "What time does your husband come in?" " He is home between 6 and 6:30 everyday." She said with a smile. "So why are you cooking so early?" "Because I like to have everything done well before he arrives, this way I can beautify myself for him and be rested and relaxed so when he does come in I am ready to greet and accept him in the manner I would any honored guest and he is so much more than a guest." Wife A nodded and continued to watch as she prepared dinner and cleaned up while she cooked! The children played in their playroom and a couple were outside. At 4:30 Wife B called the children to pray and made sure they all performed dhikr properly. Then she turned to her companion and smiled "I have to get ready for my husband to come home now." Wife A was curious " What exactly do you do?" "Well I take a bath or shower, I redo my hair or retouch it depending on what went on in the day, I am sure to wear something nice, nothing too extravagant just a nice skirt and a shirt or something. Much like what I have on now I just like to freshen my outfit from the day. I apply some nice oils and I wait for him to come in." She answered her with a slight nod. "Well don't you do anything like read or watch television?" Wife A asked. "Yes I read, I usually read Quran or some other Islamic book and I try and memorize something new from the Quran everyday but I do so in the mornings before I wake the children, in fact I had just finished right before you arrived, I also do most of my major chores like laundry and vacuuming, washing windows, dusting and anything else I know I wont be able to do once my day gets going." With that Wife A was amazed. "Well aren't you tired?" "Yes sometimes I get tired, but I do rest, like now I am going to get myself ready and then I will have maybe an hour before my husband returns, then once we have had our dinner and the children help me clean the kitchen we have a little down time with some family games, then the children are off to bed. After that I am free to rest however I please. Then I sleep. You know my day is full but I am not too tired, because I schedule everything I need and I am free on the weekends to add other things in my day, but mostly I rest and of course keep to my studying and chores. In the summer months when the children are off from school we have more time for rest because I only teach Islamic studies to them and then their are activities they can do to keep them occupied, most days I join them, but if I like I can just relax. I mean everyone knows what works best for them in their home, so I say make a schedule according to your family and its needs. " With that wife A smiled and said " Thank You for allowing me to spend the day with you, I know what I have to do now." She left allowing Wife B time to prepare for her husband and *rest*.