Care for the individual

As Salaamu Alaikunna, Today is Wednesday May 16, 2012. I would like to share some advice with you all today concerning the smallest members of our workplace. That's right you guessed it "Our Children". Many of us are full time homemakers and that means that we are with our children allday everyday, they do not leave to go to school, there are no after school activities. WE are it we are all they have. We are their teachers, their counselors, their activities coordinator. Yes we do it all ladies. I know that this can be overwhelming as some of us have multiple children with multiple ages to go with them. Even when you just have two this can be demanding. I also understand the importance of treating our children as individuals and not just a group. Over the years I learned the that all of my babies are very different and when I try to do them all together that little extra sparkle that makes them who they are gets dull and can ever burn out. My oldest is the quiet type and it took me at least 14 years to figure out that he just needed me to lead a conversation with him one on one in order for him to open up it was hard because I had other children, but once I figured this out I made it my business to invite him into my room at the end of the day or whenever we had a free moment and just talk to him, now he is 19 and after my husband he is my best friend. We talk often and sometimes we talk for over an hour (If I have the time to spare, but definitely everyday.) Then there is my second, my 12 year old she is a child who needs that extra love, she is very sensitive and she always wants me to confirm that she is special and doing things right. So for her I have to make sure and give her separate things to do and be sure to check up on her and tell her she did it correctly. It isn't a huge thing but it is something that goes a long way for her. Okay my third child,he is 9 he is a challenge for me, as he has been diagnosed with a form of autism called "savant". He is as smart as a whip, but he is also very easily distracted, and hyper and it takes so much more to get him to focus on me or look at me or anything. So for him I conform to his needs. He has an obsession with counting, he counts everything, he is constantly counting he gets number patterns stuck in his head and he has to count that pattern all day, if you interrupt him he starts all over again. So for him I make puzzles and patterns for him and I allow him to do them as long as he likes and I sit with him and done a couple with him. He likes that it makes him smile and that is priceless oh and it helps him to sit still for a minute. Which is needed. Bringing up the rear of the group is my 2 year old, she is a handful and I do not have the problem of giving her individual time, she is very assertive and she asserts herself into every part of my day.

So I guess where I am going with all of this is, make time for each child, find out what they need and like and give it to them. it doesn't have to be long maybe a few minutes a day. If you do this everyday you will see tremendously positive results.